I seriously would never want an open marriage, and I never seriously wanted to date others or try some alternative type of marriage (too much drama), but just getting my husband's thoughts on the idea, creating a mirror situation with me doing the same things, and questioning the whole concept was interesting. Also, since my husband had always seen me as "the mom," or the one holding the fabric of the marriage together, the fixer, the "stable one".... it was kind of neat for me to let go and take on a different role. By questioning things and acting differently (mysterious) I got to "try out" or act like the "more wild" one (without actually being "wild" or doing these things).... Just talking about them positively and presenting them as possible answers ("Hey we can co-parent, but still have a life with others! How much easier!!! And we can both find happiness" Gag me!!!!) it forced him to see me and the marriage in a different light. Just the idea that I *could* do the same thing. And what that would feel like. Of course, in my situation I didn't have anything to lose so I could do this. I was soooo detached.
Lester, I'm glad to hear you are detached enough to see the humor in it. I felt the same way about some of the things my husband used to say. Sometimes just the contradictions and lack of logic (this from a scientist!), would be so funny. And the crazy accusations. I'd just shake my head (when he couldn't see me) and think, what a nut!!!!
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
