I don’t totally understand what you’re saying. On one hand you say you feel “unattractive, unsexy, unpassionate, bored, resentful, etc.” but on the other hand you say you “feel very sexual, but I have felt the need to suppress it to protect...myself, I guess.” Are you saying you feel sexual but because your H isn’t aggressive enough it makes you feel unsexy?
Didn’t you go through a similar thing 5 or 6 months ago? Then you made some kind of advance or talked to your H and things took off, and within a day everything seemed to turn around. As I recall, he wasn’t quite sure where you stood and your initiating let him know. Does he know how you feel now?
As for my comment on voices, I still don’t understand why you come to the conclusion that you are not sexy if you don’t get the validation you need from your H. I mean, if he doesn’t initiate, there is a whole set on questions and answers going through your head. But why settle on the answer that you are not sexy? Why is that the default answer? Why couldn’t you as well decide it is because you are TOO hot for your H? Why do you place the “fault” on yourself?
Now, at the risk of getting you ticked off, are you sure there wouldn’t be any value in revisiting your views on feminism and how those views affect a man, because going on what you say, the problem is with him, right? Perhaps he is somehow getting the wrong impression from you.
