I love you ladies, too!!!! I cannot tell you how much your words and insight have saved me on many low days when I couldn't see 2 inches in front of my face. We've all been through horrific circumstances for so long, that we have insight now looking back.
Val - I would bet your H wishes you would have "saved" him from himself. But, that's not life, as he was also kicking and screaming that he wanted to live his life. My H recently told a friend that if I loved him and wanted the M, I would have come to him begging (this after he told me not to speak to him).
There is a limit to everything.
A friend of mine, psychiatrist, said this weekend to me....that I shouldn't hate H or think he was a jerk, b/c he was going through a mental illness/chemical alteration (drugs)....but, it also wasn't my job to help or save him. She said "let that be someone elses job, or his own, to get himself through this. It's not yours anymore, even if he does call you in a bad state."
