Hello Everyone!He still cannot tell me ILY - so I tend to hold back on mine for fear of pressuring him. It's hard to say too when you know he cannot say it back.
I don't know the timeline of your sitch, but my H didnt' say ILY for about 6-7mths after A was over last yr. I said it anyways, and didnt' expect him to say it back, I'd say it then kissed him or talk about something elso so as to not leave ackward silences nor have expectation hanging on his neck about that.
Originally Posted By: Heartbroken
I had some serious bouts of sadness driving in to work (after seeing OW this AM)
I have never seen op, but I did get those bouts of sadness just thinking about things related w/op, I can imagen that it is pretty hard on you to see her everyday, eek! Try not to let your eyes linger on her, sort of like looking at roadkill, can't help but glance at it but let your eyes gloss and look elsewhere.
Is H going through a normal emotional path right now? =================================== Yes, though As are wrong and as much as we want to minimize our H's feelings towards ows, they did have feelings for them, and it will talk a while for those misplaced feelings to go away. Men have shorter attention spans, so chances are, he'll put her behind him earlier than you will, women tend to hold on to stuff much much longer. So, give him time, it is totally normal.
========= I really need to work on my fears and I am careful not to express them to him (at least most of the time) but will I ever be fully relaxed???? ============= I also have those fears assault me, the trick is to tackle those feelings and destroy them. What if... what if a car runs me over on my way out, what if I loose my job.. I mean, there are all sort of thigns that can happen but one can't sit there and dwell on them. You can train your mind not to take you to the doom and gloom path, not time, not your H, but YOU are the one in charge of eliminating a fear that can paralize progress in your M.
Piecing is prob as hard as being separated, much to fear, much to conquer, much to deal with, it's true, but the end result is so much stronger and better
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
