GIH, you have got to get it together. I know this hurts. We all know how much this hurts.
But you mentioned children -- think of them. If nothing else -- think of your children. Whatever happens, your kids need their father. You have to find that strength within yourself to carry on, for their sake. It's going to be extremely difficult road for them should your marriage end and the family be split up -- it will be incredibly damaging to their lives if their father is not there for them.
Yes, this situation is horribly, horribly devastating, but you will live -- for your kids and other loved ones, you must. I, myself, went into this with the blackest of depressions already weighing on me, and I have thought that this betrayal by my W was going to put me over the edge. But when you put things in better perspective, you realize that you are not the only victim in this unfolding tragedy -- think of them. Be there for them.
I strongly suggest you seek out counseling. If your employer has some form of EAP (Employee Assistance Program) you might be able to get a referral -- please take advantage of that. If you feel any religious or spiritual leanings, please seek out clergy or friends who can give you referrals. Some religious organizations also have counseling services or affiliations with such services.
