MC - nervous and need advice

[forward]

"His problem."

Oh yes. Hee hee. I urge all LBSers to rehearse that one, hee hee. "Gosh, I am so sorry--that really sounds like a problem!!"

My DB session was interesting and enlightening, but also I may have to schedule another one to help me along, because there is a lot to process.

-I ALLOWED H to take over the emotional space in the relationship. This has meant he has never HAD to consider my feelings. DB counselor suggested that H has wanted to get a reaction out of me and my unwillingness to open up (and maybe to stand up to him, too??) probably infuriated him.

-Being more open in my life has had good repercussions w/other situations, such as work.

-I'm going to tell H that he cannot paint here and cannot do laundry here any more. Time for him to grow up and stop relying on me, directly or indirectly.


I talked to ILs yesterday. Told them that H said he wanted D. Also told them that H is going to have to put D1 first, not OW. But I am being careful now--I also said H was probably happy w/OW's "youthful energy" and that he probably needed to get to know her family (who sound like a very problematic bunch of people).

A friend was here on Saturday and she has been annoyed that H doesn't want to go on vacation. I asked her if she would like to go to NY w/me sometime and she is into the idea. Her daughter is just about at the age where she would have a good time w/us.

So I may just have to make my NYC trip a periodic pilgrimage!!