I think my "supporters" are my friends, and I will back them up 100 percent too.
So maybe we should drop the issue, now ok?
thanks
Which was in reply to what I said
Quote:
I think it's always good to look back at an exchange and learn from it. If we did that in our marriages we probably wouldn't have ended up here, but we're learning NOW. \:\)
Something to think about. AmyC and I talk from time to time about the power of words. I have always liked this, from the book "The Four Agreements", which I highly recommend :
Be Impeccable With Your Word.
Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.
Don't Take Anything Personally.
Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.
Don't Make Assumptions.
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.
Always Do Your Best.
Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.
My post wasn't a reply to support you, or defend others. Nor was it to 'discuss the issue'. It's my observations on how we hear other peoples words and use our own 'filters' to decide what they mean. I used your comments (Finally , a real man!) as an example on how we (the men) would see it as an attack on our ego. I used the responses of some of the 'men' as an example on how we stop speaking from our integrity and 'lash out'.
And I include a simple way of thinking about how we use words in our lives.
It is, like I said, and 'observation'.
I felt I was very careful to write it in such a way that nobody felt it was any kind of judgment on their situation. I meant to make a point that on the board, we bring our emotions and insecurities to every post, and every response.
For some reason, you interpreted it to be about 'you' and the posts that were 'for' or 'against' you. Yet if you re-read my post, the 'situation' was set up as an example.
And you asked me to 'drop it'. But I wasn't 'continuing it'.
The only reason I'm making this observation is that you responded the way you did. As if using your particular event as my 'model' was somehow critical of you. it wasn't, and it was never meant to be. I'm 'pushing' my 'calm down, be peaceful' agenda.
Perhaps this is something you might think about - whether or not you feel like anything that is said about some action you take is a 'criticism' or other negative feedback. There may be an insight her for you. I really don't know, I'm just putting it out there for you.
You're a good and decent woman, and I have a lot of respect for you and your actions. Please take a moment to re-read my original post, and understand that what I am saying is that when you become a person that a lot of people respect, then your words carry a lot of weight. and power.
And, as Spider Man says: "With Great power comes great responsibility"
cire2, baseballannie, amyc and many others are in this classification.
So please, remember the Four Agreements and Be Impeccable With your Word.
I know the feeling.
