I think there are many more reasons for you to stay in your marriage and work on it then to let it go. Your husband's words and his remorse sound very positive to me. Our husband's don't have to stay. They can just as easily leave and not have to deal with the guilt and difficulty of rebuilding... and find younger, less encumbered women. But the fact is your husband is CHOOSING to stay with you. And he's choosing to deal with the difficulties of reconciliation which are not easy because there is guilt and shame that he does have to face inside himself and deal with. It would actually be much easier for him to leave.

I'm glad you realize breaking things off with the OW may be a difficult transition for him. In time things will get much easier. Try not to hold onto any anger or blame about what happened. Doing this will help make healing easier and bring you both much closer together.

We cannot predict the future, and we cannot ever say our spouses (or anyone else) won't cheat on us or leave, but I think keeping a family together, being with someone you have history with, and having your children grow up with their dad around... there is nothing better. I've talked with a lot of divorced people and most are not happier. Many have difficulty finding healthy relationships and quite a few spend a lot of time complaining about their ex-spouses and the dramas going on between everyone. A surprising amount have restraining orders against their ex-spouses. It's really sad....

I like your attitude and I like your strength. You seem like a good person and an excellent mother. Being forgiving and loving during difficult times says a lot about a person.

There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.