Dom, thanks for your thoughts. I know she isn't getting in shape to date other men. She already looks #@#$% good to me. There is no reason for her to do that. She is doing it to make herself feel better. She has a very distorted image of herself. I want her to be happy and confident when she deals with us. If she's down in the gutter she'll never have confidence in facing our problems. As I said, there is no reason for her to go through the separation and allow time for us both to work on ourselves if it's a divorce she wants. She was adamantly done in August. She could've done it back then if that's what she wants. If she wants to prepare my son then she could've just told him we are separated. She didn't have to insist we lie to him and tell him I'm at work. We aren't telling him the truth is because we feel that this is temporary hopefully.
If I claim I'll move back in, I would be getting restraining orders and divorce papers. Not even a remote possibility. She said she will give us a chance once she straightens out her own problems. I am willing to stand by her and get her through this part and then deal with the consequences.
Right now my W doesn't want to spend time with me. She wants space. She'll get space. I'll deal with whatever comes once she get herself straightened out. She feels like she needs to deal with her problems on her own and I can respect that. She fought with it for 15 years and it ain't going to be easy to beat it now. At least I am happy she's finally going to face it.
We made ground rules for this separation. There will be no dating of other people. I trust my W that she will not do that. After all, if there's no trust then why would we even bother with this M.
M: 31 W: 31 M: 7 T: 8 S:4 D:2 Bomb dropped: too many to count or remember, 12/17/07 last one S on 9/2/07 W sent off D papers 12/31/07. Me trying to live life and hope she returns one day.
