I am so sorry for this turn in your situation, it is so hard I know...
Spite is not the best way to handle this, I can't count how many times in my head I thought of different things to do, but never did them...in the long run it will help nothing. You really need to act as if, and gal..you have to decide if you can continue to try and get the relationship back or with this development do you stop. This will determine how you handle things from this point on.
Stay positive...
Me - 44 H - 44 M - 19yrs together - 23yrs D16 S8 EA/PA - Bomb Oct20/06 Jan 8/07 Feb 01/07 Jul 15/07 H still @ home Recovered!