Wierdly though in the hap household it seems like it's generally the other way around. H is the one who likes to engage in a pity party and I'm the one trying to see the funny side. He hates it though, he thinks I'm being too frivolous about a serious situation
BTDT- I think in that sort of situation you are supposed to express admiration for the man, as in "It seems like you are dealing with a really challenging situation. I'm sure you can handle it." Of course, it comes down to the same/opposite issue that the man who is trying to be superior might have to deal with which is "How do you express admiration/love for somebody who isn't acting admirable/lovable?" Of course, everybody wants to be loved AND admired but I think Deida's take on the matter would be that at core a woman will care more about being loved and at core a man will care more about being admired. Maybe the way to think about it is that the woman is being lovable when she expresses admiration and the man is being admirable when he expresses love. However, I think there must be some base level at which a decision must be made about whether you are being honest in your expression. A man probably shouldn't be in relationship with a woman who doesn't admire him and a woman probably shouldn't be in relationship with a man who doesn't love her and vice versa but obviously it's all very chicken and the eggy.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
