I suggest you get a magazine subscription to something like Wired, Popular Science, Mental Floss (my personal favorite), etc. and read a little each day until you find something worth talking about.
You can quickly summarize your work day, and then say "but I was reading this really interesting thing today ..."
I find if I don't do mental stuff that is NOT work each day, I go crazy. But that's me.
Chrome
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
for sure. I'm just sayin...it would be easier if I had something to talk about that wasn't so obscure, and didn't require drawing diagrams.
Wow. It must really suck to be you. Sounds like you have no choice in the matter, this is what life has handed you... and oh, honey... go have a life on your own, with your own friends and interests... fck me now and then... or actually, don't, I need something to complain about, otherwise, I'd never say a word... Let me know how we're doing, occasionally... I'll be in my... bat cave.
Oh, and I meant to add as a side note, you guys really need to get an office prank thing going. Man, talk about having something to look forward to, break the monotony, add some laughter. I live for that stuff. Like inserting VERY candid photos of the professors into the pull down maps on the wall or in their powerpoint lectures. Plus you never know when it is going to happen to you. Keeps you on your toes.
Chrome
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
When I would notice someone doing that to me... I'd think the... 'what gives?' thing, too. If you don't want to know... why ask?
Then I came up with a list of 10-15 smart-azz obscure answers to throw back at them when I noticed they really didn't want to know... and amused myself thusly...
I do wonder with you guys if the job takes up so much brain power that you have nothing left to contemplate life's other mysteries.
There have been times when S. has come home and inhabited part of the couch for the evening but never really "been there" for days or weeks on end. When he woke up at 4 in the morning with a solution. When he *could* not get his brain to switch tracks to anything else (no matter how much *he* wanted to). It happens; I think it comes with the territory in that job.
When it happens a lot, though ... when he doesn't have any mental run time for me or his music or his friends or anything else he holds dear .... the job is out of balance and, far from being a Noble Purpose, becomes a monster devouring his life.
He does his best to minimize that, thankfully. But sometimes it can't be helped, if there's a big push on for delivery, etc.
Ok, see, Cac, this is where you failed to bore me .... why on *earth* would only passwords beginning with "a" work? Layman's terms, please (wink).
"Show me a completely smooth operation and I'll show you someone who's covering mistakes. Real boats rock." -- Frank Herbert
But in all seriousness, if someone believes in UFOs, so what? Unless they try to force it to be taught as truth in a classroom, or use it to justify repressive or violent behavior, it hurts no one.
There is a really brilliant mathematician at my school that believes the Earth is approximately 6000 years old. He is still a brilliant mathematician, just wrong about the age of the Earth.
Chrome
Yeah, I know that now.
Only in retrospect can I see how badly fused we both were. I was profoundly uncomfortable at the thought of having a wildly divergent view of the universe from my husband. Also, I didn't get that someone could legitimately hold a different view and not be hacking away at the conceptual foundations of my universe -- "if you think A and I think B, you're saying I'm wrong and oh my God I probably am wrong, but I don't really think I'm wrong I'm so confused why are you making me doubt myself? you're so cruel......"(of course none of this was subconsciously vocalized like that; all very subterranean emotional stuff ....Cold shiver ... I'm still working through this one; knowing the path vs. walking the path.) He wanted validation of his research, thereby himself, and when it wasn't forthcoming, pitched some spectacular fusion fits (the intensity of those was down to FOO stuff, but neither of us knew what we didn't know at the time.)
Hmmmmm, must be my designated "channeling Corri" post for the day ...
.. and why can't I stop talking?
"Show me a completely smooth operation and I'll show you someone who's covering mistakes. Real boats rock." -- Frank Herbert
Oh, my. I'm surprised you even still *had* a cow/swan/whatever we're calling it at the moment -- nurturing animal -- after that ....
It was kind of a learning experience for me. I was part of a large social circle at the time and the guy who was clearly the male Alpha (surly style) kind of clued me in to what was being said in a sort of big brother way. I was stunned and angry but I didn't tell anybody what had "really" happened so that means I was more of a "man" than the loser who dissed me. Anyway, after that I knew for sure that if I couldn't get or hold an Alpha I was safer sexually with a grinning Wolf than a superficially sweet Beta.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
Ok, see, Cac, this is where you failed to bore me .... why on *earth* would only passwords beginning with "a" work? Layman's terms, please (wink).
I don't know. Ask the software engineer. {tap...tap...tap...}.
I'm the network engineer. we don't actually know how anything works; we are tasked with figuring out how to make it work...together. I can see on the de-bug console of the thingamajig that the password entered on the whatsis is being passed on to the whatchamacallit with the first character changed to the letter "a". Which, of course, returns an "incorrect password/access denied" error. "Password" is being changed to "Assword". I'll figure it out, eventually. and when I do, I'll be quite pleased with myself.
Obviously, I make this sound much more dull than it really is. I wasn't trying to do that, but I did anyway. But thats exactly my point; If you don't understand this little obscure niche, it does sound boring. Its not, to me, but its hard to talk about, to others. Thats allz I'm sayin'. someone (I don't even remember who, now) said "talk about work"...its not so easy. Wow. It must really suck to be you. Sounds like you have no choice in the matter, this is what life has handed you... and oh, honey... go have a life on your own, with your own friends and interests... fck me now and then... or actually, don't, I need something to complain about, otherwise, I'd never say a word... Let me know how we're doing, occasionally... I'll be in my... bat cave. you know...that does sound oddly appealing. I imagine that gay people must have it easy without this annoying mars/venus bs. (not that there's anything wrong with that) But again, I'm not "complaining" about my job...I'm just saying that the topic of "what I did today" is not a conversation that flows freely. Heck, if I only had a nickel for every time I had a conversation with a user, upon my fixing of some problem, they curiously asked, "so, why was it doing that??"...and then they think about it for a second, and before I can start to answer, they say, "STOP. nevermind. I don't think I really want to know"...to which I just and say, "good choice". Oh, and I meant to add as a side note, you guys really need to get an office prank thing going. Man, talk about having something to look forward to, break the monotony, add some laughter. I live for that stuff. Like inserting VERY candid photos of the professors into the pull down maps on the wall or in their powerpoint lectures. yeah...um....that wouldn't go over big in the "private sector". I can just imagine the pics of my boss with his fake buck-teeth and coke-bottle glasses and propeller bini popping up in a presentation to the board of directors of the highly visible big-city development proposal... But those pictures DO exist.
For some reason I never saw your post concerning Schlessinger. It does sound like she talks out of both sides of her mouth, but that doesn't change the message in her book. I do agree with CAC that Schlessinger may use some outdated examples in her book, but they are not that out dated. There are lots of SAHM moms where we live. I don't know whether they are happy or not.
I also withhold judgment on her recommendations to women on how to better treat an H. I think there are plenty of ways to address the problems in a specific M, so each woman can decide for herself.
But I do think her explanation of how men feel is right on, right down to the fact that men can also be their own worst enemy. Men too often don't give a straight honest answer to women about how they feel. They are afraid to hurt the woman's feelings and have been taught by other women not to do this.
We men know we do this, yet we do it anyway. Women know we do this yet they continue to exploit and perpetuate this system. It's like a massive unspoken contract. So regardless of whether Schlessinger is a hypocrite or not, I still believe fully in her message.
