It's not a person that "makes" you happy. Happiness is something you have to find and build in yourself. Relying on someone else for happiness is a big burden, it makes happiness completely conditional. That's very unhealthy.
ROOT I completely agree. That is something I am figuring out slowly. I was just saying this is my H's point. I don't think it has anything to do with any "one" making us happy, it is just frustrating that my H is in such a fog that he thinks his feelings and desire for happiness trumps mine. I know he is not what makes me happy, and actually while I was out running errands today, H and the OW crossed my mind and I thought to myself 'wow it is pretty sad that my H had to find someone to try to make himself happy, yet i am able to find happiness within myself'.
so i guess that i what you are saying, and that is what i have been learning.
