I started coming here in May, my husband had left and after reading DR I was determined to save my M. After DB'g my ass off he came back in June but left again August 2nd. At this point I don't know if I want to save my M. There is no OP, he has some serious mental issues that I don't know if he is willing to get help for. I know he loves me but I don't know if he is good for me. The first 3 years we were together he left 7 times. I would come home & his stuff would be gone, no note, nothing. The last time (before May) was 5 years ago and he was gone for 6 months, quit his job, left the state, no contact the whole time. When he came back I said that would be the last time I would take him back and he agreed to get help, got on AD meds, went to counselling and things were great for 6 months b4 he stopped taking the meds. The last 4 years were good, for the most part, and I was feeling like he had gotten over whatever anxiety that made him run away. Then he got a big promotion and overnight he changed. Within 2 weeks he was gone (said he was going to a meeting and never came back). I know that this is about him, his insecurity, depression, anxiety, and I know that I did everything I could to make the marriage work. At this point he has to help himself. I don't know if it will happen and not sure if I could trust him again. He refused to help with the bills so I filed for spousal support w/o D and he was served Aug 17. He got a lawyer and answered by filing for D on Sept 6 so now I have to get a L. I hate all of this. This has been the most difficult, painful month of my life. I am so grateful for you people because even though I wasn't posting, I was reading, and crying, and laughing with all of you. Your strength and wisdom and generosity of spirit (and sense of humor!) have been a blessing for me during this nightmare. Thank you all!!
