CVA - "B,B&B"

[Kelley]

CVA,
Wow my H could have written this same post. Damn this made me cry again and I haven't done that in about 3 weeks.

It is wrong not for her to call you by your name. Next time she says Hey you, I would tell her my name is CVA and that is what I would like to at least be called. Tell her what you said here.


Don't think that you haven't changed. An unhappy R or M can put us in a frame of mind that makes us unhappy and therefore we tend to blow up on the little things. When we fight, it is never about the glass that was mistakenly broke, it is about the feelings of disrepect that we have been feeling from the other person. Since you are not getting anything from your W in return is just making you feel like you will always be this angry/miserable person which just isn't true. My H says the same thing about me that I was always mean to him. I know that I wasn't. You sound like a really good person to me, you can talk, you can open up and IMHO any man who can do that has to have a really good core personality to them. We all get angry at times but that isn't us. I am sure you don't go up to anybody and tell them good F'ing morning, bite me. We are human and react in that way to bad situations.

Your W had to love you and I wouldn't think otherwise. I am sure that my H probably says this about me too that I never ever loved him which just isn't true. I did love him with all my heart but so many wedges just drove us apart that I withdrew. I am sure your W did feel the same love for you too. Don't ever think that she never loved you just some people have a hard time showing it or get so wrapped up in other things that they forget to show it. Another thing that maybe your W might have felt like this too. I did. I depended on my H to make me happy like it was all of his responsibility. Love should always be about making your S happy but we all often lose sight of that. When he wasn't making me happy than I thought that he didn't love me. I think alot of woman may feel this way that our H's should be the loving devoting H like we have all seen on soap opera's and when we don't get that we believe that he doesn't love us and blame them for the M going wrong. It is no one's fault just our own way of how we deal with things or what we grow to beleive is the way marriage should be. I realize now just how wrong all of this was now but never did before the bombs hit. Some people never realize this and will keep having broken R's.

Even if you don't get back with W, you too will still always have a love connection between you. It won't be the way that you may want or the love between a H & W but it will always be a deep caring for one another. Your W may not be able to show this right now but a year or 2 down the line when things aren't so emotional and a friendship can be worked back in then maybe she will start to show this.