Late Monday night, I wrote a letter to my W telling her that I forgive her. I worded it to make it perfectly clear that I was forgiving the transgressions but not condoning them, and that I would struggle to continue to forgive her for the continuing injury she is doing to myself, our M and our children.
I even went so far as to say that I forgive the OM, my MIL and all of W's friends and coworkers who have been enabling W's behavior.
I expressed a lot of the sentiments about forgiveness that I have posted here in these forums as well.
Now, I wrote this letter and have filed it away on my computer. It satisfies the first level of forgiveness, because it represents a vow I am making between me and God. The reason I have not yet given the letter to my W, and the reason I am not yet prepared to do so, is because W is far from being repentant of what she has done and is doing. I do not want her to think I am supporting her ongoing behavior -- i.e., being an enabler.
