nephartiti, good for you for not calling. try to stop checking on the bank acct so much if possible...is starting to feel a bit like snooping, which (trust me) only will end up hurting you in the long run. if you are worried about the money, just check the balances, but not where he was, etc.
(((HUGS))) I do get the waking up and reminding yourself of the reality of it. that part is hard. I had a dream a month or so ago and I swear I thought H was in bed with me, that all of this (I'm talking all of it, the affair, everything) had been a dream. I was so out of it when I woke up I reached for him to comfort me because the "dream" had been so real. took me a minute to realize it wasn't a dream after all.
take care.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
