Is this an accurate representation of Dieda? If so, I have a couple questions.

1) Re: #3 What kinds of gifts will I be getting? I have a tendency to lose jewelery so maybe cash would be best.

all gifts are dispersed at the sole discretion of the giver, and are non-transferrable. rewards offer valid in all 50 states, except where expresely prohibited by law. no warantees as to the actual cash value of said gifts is expressed or implied. see aggreement for complete details.
2) Re: #4 If I take care of the whole Dr.Laura list by noon, can I slack off for the rest of the day reading novels and wandering around plant nurseries spending my cash gift?
a: depends on the specific purpose. If the candidate's purpose happens to be "brokering stocks", then the answer would most probably be "yes". However, if the purpose was something more along the lines of...say..."jazz saxophonist"...the gifts will be somewhat more um..."sparse". In such cases, it is likely that your afternoons will find you otherwise occupied with "persuits" that bring their own reward.

In all seriousness, while this guys musings may inspire a bit of contemplative chin-stroking for some, much of it really comes off as being quite anti-female...which goes against my hippie-dippy leftist upbringing.

Someone (I don't know who) far wiser than Deida had a better piece of advice for people like me:

"Don't quit yer day job"