He didnt say but assume he got online to see the new bill.
This morning I this si how our email convo went: WARNING VERY LONG!!Thanks in advance if you read it entirely!
Before I start let me remind you of the imaginary BF that my H thinks I have( its really just a freind, but i wanted to drop this imaginary thing once & for all for the jealously is really getting to him)
M- Let me know if for sure you can stay w/the girls Saturday so I can work & ask my boss for overtime.<its his turn to keep them,previously he said he wouldnt babysit for me and my BF> And why is it some men just cant be freinds w/out anything more? I called it off w/ him lastnight for we are in 2 different levels. I dont need or want anything serious right now. Anyhoo, lets try to get through this day w/out any attacks, ok?
H- I will keep the kids for you this weekend if you want me to. I will be working Saturday also but I will bring all three of them to work w/ me the two little ones have been asking me when am I gonna bring them to work w/ me. So what did this douche bag want? Is he desperate for attention? I cant tell u what to do but as a freind if I ever was one I would tell you to take it easy. And no I am not going to argue w/you today. It was nice to see you yesturday.
M- Thanks. It was nice seeing you too. I like it when we can talk w/ no arguments. It really isnt worth it. I no longer care about being right and just try to learn from my past and move along w/ whatever punches this life wants to throw at me. I told him (my imaginary BF)that I will not be good for him or anyone right now. I said I would only prolly end up hurting him for I might be on the rebound. Its never good to jump from one relationship straight to another. Anyhoo, thanks for taking the time...I am rambling here.
H- No its not good jumping from one R to another, belive me.All I want is to be by myself. You can ramble all you want. (??thats a change?)Whats the deal w/ his kid?
M- He is divorced but has primary custody of his kid and the ex cheated on him and doesnt even want the boy. The boy is an adorable 4yr old and I feel sorry for him.But he seems to be a responsible father. <all of this is true regarding my FREIND>
H- I think he is looking for a mommy for his son, you have three of your own, I dont think you are ready to add another kid.I know I am not.
M- You know when you told me you were having a difficult time adjusting to her kid (OW)?I didnt understand that but someonelse I know dated a divorced man w/ a kid and said the same thing.I dont know if it make s a diff b/c I am alread a mom,but I couldnt turn down being a mom to another kid if I absolutley had to do it.
H- You know I love my kids way too much all three of them. And it hurts me that I am living somewhere else without them. And it hurts me even more knowing that there will be somebody else with them.But beleive me it is not easy dealing with other peoples kids.
So this I knew from months ago when he confessed that OW kid is a spoiled brat. D10 told me that her D10 complains an dwines to her mom when H does not do what she asks him to do.
I just wanted to comment on the electic bill - maybe he got so angry about it b/c he found out about it online & made all kinds of assumptions about it i/o of hearing it from you first?
Nice convo chicki, made a lot of sense how he feels and thinks. Too bad for the douche bag comment though. If he feels powerful to call you names, let him be. My W call me names all the time, I let her feel guilt when she does since she says she better watch the manner she speaks.
About your bill: If H dont live there and dont want to pay the bill, then you did what I would do. It seems he wants to live with OW and dont want to see you be independent of him. This alone shows how inconsiderate of him. He should be happy you are doing your own thing and taking responsiblity for it.
About the OM: I agree that you dont leave on R for another. That alone tells a person how much they cherish their M. I made a good note of that to my W when she was continuously calling this OM. I mentioned how can you just leave our M and get into a R with this OM given the fact he is still M. Long story there.
All in all congrats for having a wonderful convo. You are handling matters in the right way.
Congrats!!!
See the W, Listen to the W, but dont Speak back to the W. Bridle your tongue...
Does anyone know who has been here on Db the longest? I wonder how long they keep our posts? Thinking I might print these out since I dont do any other form of journaling.
Nothing new or bad to report. Strange, H never calls to speak w/ the girls unles MAYBE if he is of town on business. H waits for kids to call him first. H must of been missing them a lot. He called and didnt even say hi( I normally have the kids answer but it had been ringing for awhile so I picked up).
Guess it kinda hurt to see he didnt ask to talk to me so I asked D10 if he didnt say he wanted to talk to me and she said oh yeah,but he said after he talk to D7(his fav), but I didnt get to.
We were doing homework when D10 said she needed help w/ fractions(UGH). That is one thing I am not good at. So, I knew H (being in the good mood he was in) wouldnt mind if she called him for help (even though he says he isnt good at fractions either).Well, H was able to help her afterall. D10 explained how mommy doesnt know and H said "I know". I made sure to whisper to D10 to thank him afterwards, which she did. Then H told her she can call him anytime is she needs help w/ homework.
He told the girls he would definately be there for open house at school tonight and that he will meet us there. I know OW will be calling him if it gets too late..oh well. Last week when I asked him I said are you sure your coming? He said yes why, is SOMEONELSE gonna be there? Meaning my(BF). No, I said b/c last year you made a fuse about it and you really didnt want to go (OW R was too new). H said I will be there.
All in it was good, b/c D10 was hesitant to call H b/c they dont have a close R. D10 is extremly shy and H gets agravated w/ that instead of trying to help her.
That is something I told W that I will always be a part of D's life, whether she like it or not. Open house for D when that time comes, who will be the 'daddy' only me and no one else. I am pretty good at math, that's one thing W can say about me besides other skills, but Im not too excited about English.
See the W, Listen to the W, but dont Speak back to the W. Bridle your tongue...
I dont know if maybe his admitting to me yesturday about it hurting him to think there might be another man to be his girls "daddy" has made him want to be more involved w/ them and therefore the call from last night?
You see I in a way I beleive this imaginary BF has got him to think a little different if not for my benefit for the girls benefit.
I will make sure I look super "hot" tonight. I have been trying to "appreciate" or "like" my new boobs a bit better by dreesing differntly. The doctor here the other day asked if I had gotten them evne bigger, but that they look good and they make my stomach look even smaller. I am sure its the top I wore b/c since I dont feel comforatble w/ the big ones I tend to hide them under bigger tops. I remember though one time H was pleased?? b/c he noticed his freind looking at them and told me so afterwards. Is the "trophy" wife thing? I dont get it? When we are driving he gets upset when a stranger is staring at me and causes road rage?
LOL, its good to get attention if H isnt being attentive enough. I wish my W would get some more revealing clothing but that aint her and had never been her. Its kinda like a young woman in an old woman clothing so to speak.
See the W, Listen to the W, but dont Speak back to the W. Bridle your tongue...
MMH I have a question for you but its kinda of a private matter. I'd like your mans opinion about.
I guess I will attempt it without getting too graphic. Sometime ago H IM's me getting very open about what he always wanted me to do sexually but that I am not that kinda of a woman. I told him I was not a mind reader b/c he said I should know what he wants after so many years of M. I told him I had no promblem doing what he wanted but I had no idea b/c when I would do that he didnt make it seem like it was a big deal. When you men see us as "not that kind of a woman", do feelings change once we become "that kinda of a woman"? What I am saying is if he once fell in love w/ the old innocent, naive sexually girl I was, will he see me as "slutty" now if I change to what he wants?
