Frustrated and More Saddened #3

[Heimlich]

Ug, Stew, for what it's worth, I got the same basic speech. You know what, we may have played a role (maybe even the largest role) in causing our spouse to feel as they do. OK. Fine. We own that and are trying to be better. What we can't own is our spouses swallowing their feelings of unhappiness about us; then turning around and saying that they are unhappy ONLY because of us. That is absolute and total BS. We may be part of the reason, but we ain't the whole reason. Don't let it shake you for long.

Good job on allowing her to vent and giving her space. At least she did agree to attend the MC session tomorrow, so that's something.

Moving out is a tough call. I've got an ebook on separating that was pretty good. Going to reread it next week. Drop me a line if you want me to send it to you: [e-mail]

I know that since I've been moving, it's been stressful because I've been tired, a little mopy/sad, and snappish toward my W, but I do feel the pressure from both of us being removed. WIthout my W being willing to work on the M together, there was no way that my staying in the house would have caused a breakthrough. I would have eventually just gone insane with not being able to express my feelings. However, with her being "done" and me being willing to move out but leaving the door open, I think there might be a chance. Of course, it might all be BS and she's just waiting to move the once and future OM into my spot, but that's HER decision and reflects poorly on her, not me.

And seriously, you knew this wasn't going to be smooth sailing. Keep on keeping on.

BD