I'm sorry to see you struggling so much but there is a reason for it and there is a lesson in it. Search for that reason and learn the lesson that is being taught.
I know how how low and how small the world can make you feel. Please keep in mind just how much the people in this forum admire your strength, tenacity and most of all, your faith.
You are handling things in the right way. You are handling things in His way. Don't be discouraged.
