Frank I am very much aware that there is a root cause to this dysfunction and that it is not the alcohol. Hell just the other night my husband himself referred to alcohol as his "medicine". I get it. I've never been one to say "My husband is sick. He can't help himself". Bullcrap. He's just gotta wanna.
I figured you did, just wanted to put out my own experiences and observations. You talked about what you could do to get him working on this issue. One thing is to talk to him about how he's medicating himself, and doesn't it piss him off that a 'substance' has such a hold on him?
And of course, what is really going on inside him that he feels like he needs to medicate?
Lastly, he needs to talk to another MAN. Not necessarily a 'recovered alcoholic' per se but a man who has had the downs he's had. Men need the input and company of other men to sort out their crap.
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But I do believe there is something to be gained by looking into Alanon/Alateen to help me and my kids. If nothing else, it's better than continuing to deny and enable 'cause that sure as hell hasn't gotten us anywhere and I have literally watched him climb further into the bottle over the last few months.
I think you are right about this also.
I'm not saying AA or Al-Anon have no value. I'm saying that they aren't the 'saviour' they are made out to be.
COG, it's not '1 in 10', it's "1 in 100 do not stay in AA and 'get sober'".
