She then tells me that she also realized that she's been a "functioning depressed person" but inreality its barely functioning. She acted terribly busy and always behind. Always late. Always something more important to do. And by doing so she actually gets very little done and (here's the kicker) lays everything on me. She says she has for years avoided doing anything (like keeping up on her martial arts, learning new things, etc) and layed the entire responsibility on me. When she saw me bite the dust the other day she realized that it's not fair. That I could have easily been hurt really badly and the responsibility would still be on my because she doesn't know how to do anything. Because she has avoided learning.
I was trying to explain this EXACT THING to Loon, over on her thread. I've also been discussing this concept with a friend of mine: women who stop growing, who get BORED... are LETHAL, to themselves and others.
This ALONE is probably the best news I've ever heard for anyone... and you, Xue, helped give her space to see it and find it. Good for you. Excellent!!!!
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This is very different. Way back when she was determined to learn things to be independent from me. It was very negative. It was avoidance. Now she wants to take responsibility to be part of a team. To do her share.
FCKING A!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This... is IT.
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She wants badly to be somebody different after her big realization. I just hope she can realize it's going to take tiny steps to get there and not be so hard on herself that she doesn't.
Ah. Well. When the student is ready, the teacher appears.
Good for you. Excellent!!!!
