MC - nervous and need advice

[inmyplace]

breton,

Nothing wrong with being scared. This is something new. The unknown can be scary. Even for simple things like the first time I go to a new nature area, my heart beats a little faster than usual. But then when I get going, I relax.

Good luck.

IMP

[celestial]

Breton

You can do this. You are a strong, brave woman. H will respect you, but he probably won`t show it. He`s put you through so much, don`t be afraid to stand up to him and show him how a real woman behaves.

Don`t worry about your future, no one ever really knows what tomorrow will bring.

Celestial

[forward]

I was distraught today, thinking a number by the phone was a L. Turned out it was someone from H's job. But it left me upset.


Detaching is on again/off again. OW did not call the house today and I couldn't help but wonder what was up with that.

[Grace_O]

I hope you're feeling better today. I'm still waiting to get a handle on the whole detaching thing. It seems like when I'm doing best, I just sort of slip.

Have a good one.

[forward]

The appointment is tomorrow, so I will have an update at that time.

Not looking forward to it, I have to say.

[celestial]

I was distraught today, thinking a number by the phone was a L. Turned out it was someone from H's job. But it left me upset.

This is why we should never assume anything.

Detaching is on again/off again

Get through tomorrow first, then you`ll be able to start detaching. This is a very emotional time for you, do what`s best for you for your own sanity. You will get through this.

OW did not call the house today and I couldn't help but wonder what was up with that.

Assumimg again.

GOOD LUCK!!!!!
Celestial

[inmyplace]

Yep, celestial, you hit the key points.

[forward]

Well, H is on edge (as I am) and told me that he would walk out if I asked for anything else when "he needs the money for food."

I need to find a way to make the point that by refusing to contribute what a court would say is his share, H is still expecting me to take care of him.

What do I do if H walks out?

[inmyplace]

I need to find a way to make the point that by refusing to contribute what a court would say is his share, H is still expecting me to take care of him.

breton, your best bet is to let the mediator tell him the score. It isn't that you are taking care of him, but rather than he is not taking care of his children. That is why you have a mediator.

What do I do if H walks out?

Let him go. You really can't stop him. Ask mediator what to do (mediator really can't take sides though). I wouldn't be surprised if the mediator would say get a lawyer. Get in touch with DB coach.

One step at a time.

IMP

[forward]

I have DB appointment on Saturday and mediation is tomorrow, so I do not get any pre-meeting coaching.

I guess H is nervous about it, too.

I think it is likely good advice to let mediator do the talking.