Tucson or Bust, part 3

[MJontheMend]

Compassion:sympathetic consciousness of others' distress together with a desire to alleviate it

Empathy:the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another of either the past or present without having the feelings, thoughts, and experience fully communicated in an objectively explicit manner; also : the capacity for this

Sympathy:the act or capacity of entering into or sharing the feelings or interests of another b : the feeling or mental state brought about by such sensitivity

Differentiation as briefly defined by Schnarch is the ability to maintain both individuality and emotional connection. Fusion is emotional connection without individuality.


I think the "desire to alleviate it" component of compassion clearly makes it different from differentiation. I think a differentiated person would be empathetic and then make a choice regarding any action to alleviate distress. Simple example being mother choosing whether to leave crying baby in crib. She may feel deep empathy with the babies distress but freely choose to let the baby cry itself to sleep or vice versa but she won't think "the baby made me walk it across the floor for two hours" if she is making a free choice to do so.