Quote: I love to spoon too, the rest will come....
actually the rest (if the rest is in reference to more physical) it's there...that was what the kiss would have lead to...what my sitting on the couch was leading to...I hugged him..he hugged me...I then just sat cuddled next to him...he started to rub my back..was nice..but the hands started to focus in a direction that was sexual and that was not what I wanted so I got up...but not abruptly..
this am..in the wee hours..h's beeper was making noise so he got up to shut it off...upon returning to spoon me again..more cuddling and a caressing that was nice..but those hands started to caress in a sexual direction...think h sensed that wasn't what I wanted so stopped.
it's odd because yes sex is most definatley something I want...but I would also like the hugs and cuddling that don't lead there...the physical intimacy that is not sexual.
I used to have a problem with that with h...and honestly still do at times..sheesh just look back at how bothered I was by our bath and shower together that lead to nothing...I wasn't appreciating the simplicity of things.
this is a tough issue with me...I guess what it comes down to is ...yes I want h to kiss me...to hug me..to caress me..but I want it to be because he feels close to me..out of love out of a feeling etc...not just because he's horny...know what I mean..of course horny sex is just fine too.( actually sometimes more fine) but right now I don't want horny sex with h...I want some emotion behind it..right now h seems to confused to know the difference. but that again is me analyzing h...last night he could have just felt it..we did have two nice days together.
