ok...was scanning another thread (rjj) and picked up on some w's questioning whether or not their h's ever really did love them...and this is what I said to them...
I listening (or rather reading) bits of this converation...was it lies..did they love us ever?? etc..
what I've come to realize is that yes they did and a part of them still does... but for whatever reason that part is either burried or they're protecting it...all we can do is sit back and do our best to be our best and wait and see if the dust (or in some cases mortar) can slowly get brushed away til those feelings are uncovered.
though I have not felt special to my h for many years...I do recall feeling like the luckiest girl in the world... I was once special to him...even gave me a charm that said ...someone special...that feeling has been lost and sometimes it gets so lost we don't even know why so then don't know how to get it back.
think for a moment...maybe the fact that we doubted their love for us made us unhappy and therefore they see that they can't make us happy so they are unhappy and thus must not love us right??
the only easy way to describe it is this..(sorry to the prudish) a man wants to please his woman in bed (gee maybe that's why we've learned to moan) if he doesn't he feels innadequate...can't please her...therefore he doesn't enjoy himself either and sex soon become a dissinterest. if they try in their way to make us feel loved and we are not pleased would the same reaction not happen???
LL
maybe though he says it him and not me...it is infact me..there is nothing I am doing that he doesn't like...he feels loved..he just doesn't feel like his love is being appreciated? he's not good enough for me?? etc.
