So... anyways... I removed the box for me... because it was getting in MY way. Yeah, an offshoot of that is that me putting you in any kind of box is unfair... but fairness was not the motivating factor.
I think it has more along the lines to do with self-trust. And I really got all this from Lou, actually... when he told me, on whatever thread that was... how he saw me... I thought... oh my goodness, I had no idea... and it helped me to know that he saw me that way so that I could try and communicate with him in a better way...
Then I thought. Hmmm. Interesting. I must be seeing Lou in a certain way, too... because I 'heard' in my head the tone of voice I would imagine him saying that to me. And then I realized... I have no earthly idea whatsoever if he would say it to me that way or not, because I don't KNOW Lou. And I realized... I was the one who did that.
Then I tried to imagine how I melt have felt if different folks on the board had said the exact same thing to me... and I got different feelings from that little exercise...
And I realized... what I had been doing... and never even knew it. But of all people on here... I'm pretty sure I gave you the most cold and negative voice.
I may or may not come to the same conclusion if I knew you IRL. But I have no way of knowing that, and therefore, it is a hindering assumption for me to make... and again, not fair to you at all... or everyone else I've done it to, good, bad or indifferent.
So. I changed that. Cuz I can. And I did it for me. Once I did that -- started throwing all those frames and boxes away -- I saw different things.
You can't see what you can't see. Until you do. Imagine the word 'do' as its own verb, instead of an implication of 'do see.' Sentence reads a little different, doesn't it? And all it takes is a slight shift in perspective.
