There were people here who thought NOP was 'brainwashing' and telling Choco to D. 1. Thats pretty demeaning to Choco. 2. Thats giving a lot of evil intent and power to Nop. 3. It shows a lot of ignorance of what is important to the Nops. Im glad Choc posted and reaffirmed, that was not the case. AT all.
Stop ascribing negative intent. Not only does it limit you, its ugly.
Man, I've gotta come out of my office more. I didn't even have any idea this thought was floating around, or I would have squelched it LONG ago.
That's a load o' horsekrap. If anything, there were many times when it was ME who wanted to throw in the towel, but NOP encouraged me, and he comes from a very "pro-marriage" orientation with his approach, applied with an admittedly "tough love" set of strategies and tactics. He realized that many of my wife's tendencies and attributes, if they could be applied positively, would HELP make a great wife, and a great marriage, that could actually be better than it had ever been. "Stubbornness" can be "steadfastness," and "industriousness" can be applied to working hard to keep an affair secret, or it can be applied to helping a family grow financially or otherwise.
NOP (and MrsNOP) helped me to stop feeling sorry for myself, and to start eating the sh!t sandwich that life had dealt me one bite at a time, and to attack my contributions to the unsavory meal as well. He not only PREDICTED, on this very board, that my wife's affair was going to happen if I didn't stop feeling sorry for myself and avoiding the problems in my marriage, but he never ONCE said "I told you so" when it did, in fact, happen. Instead, he patiently but firmly held up a "So What Are You Going to Do About It, Choc?" bar, and then helped me (and is still helping me) to hit it.
End of hijack; sorry, Hairdog. If anyone would care to respond, you may do so on my thread.
