Hope - Your post was long but incredibly well structured, and easy to follow. I think it is like a rollercoaster ride they have to get on and ride out. I get the sense of my h being 'out of control' and driven. He wants to act one way, but is driven to act another.
It is such a mess. But, at least you can talk honestly to each other, which is something you just can't do in the earlier stages.
It does sound like a textbook: all the things we are told are happening seem set out. What we only dimly realise is the DAMAGE.
