I think you are afraid to let the cow out these days because in your M the cow was the only one in the menagerie having a relationship. Because that R sucked you don't trust the cow. There is basically nothing wrong with making tarts for someone if that is what you feel like doing. But your H was keen to make sure you kept the rest of the animals in their cages and just made tarts for him whenever he wanted them and he got to tell you whether you'd made them "with love" or not. BLECH! The cow has been milked dry. So the other animals have to be let out to play now, while the cow just munches on some nice sweet grass.
If a guy was good at say playing guitar and he picked up his guitar and sang you a song, you'd be happy and he would too. That's all you did, you just gifted NG with one of your talents. It's fine. Expectations again, it goes wrong when you start making tarts to cheer him up, or ingratiate yourself, or in the hopes you'll get sex. It doesn't have to be the cow making the tarts. It can just be Jenny.
Yes, that was pretty much the conclusion I came to. I was purposefully repressing my cow which is just as lame as the reverse. Actually, NG did play his guitar for me but he didn't sing because he sings in his head voice and he says it can tend towards turning women off - lol
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
