Have you moved out SM? Whatever you do, DON'T MOVE OUT until you've talked to people, gotten wise counsel, and the whole nine yards. This is a very difficult journey to take. Go into it as well-prepared as you can, with an eye towards reconciliation, if it's at all possible.
You'll soon receive much better advise than from this newbie, so stick around. You've come to the right place to talk/work this out.
