Yea, i'm going to need loads of it. For the second time, he's told me he feels no connection with me and that's why he didnt' think of appologizing, only to get rid of the problem at the time. His T told him he has a huge problem with confronting conflict, that the fact that I express myself better and he can't think that fast to answer makes him mad and he turns loud to back me off. That he should be brutally honest (in a ways, what I 've been asking from him, just TELL THE TRUTH)
That he still had feelings to deal with so they dont' come back (towards op). That he should be the one understanding why they happened and make them go away on his very own. I agree with all of the above. He said he does want us to work, that he's with me and is hoping that as time passes things will get better.
Yes, I know it's all too recent, the "not just friends" book says that the first 2-3months are the hardest, when both partners are ambivalent. I almost wanted to shout to him "if you have feelings for her and none for me then go and leave with her". Yes, he is telling me the truth, but how it hurts.
Yes, I understand. But right now, I'm crying, because this man I love doesnt love me. And i'm crying because no one else but you guys and maybe the C will hear this from me. Stupid love songs.
I must go on and be myself, but it mightl feel like I have this 3 foot long sword in my chest while I go about my business. Having a pity party now, so bear with me, i'm sure later I'll be fine and that these tears will let that sadness out and that I will soldier on tomorrow and smile when I get home.
Hugs all)))))))))))))))))))) thanks for hanging in there for me.
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
