That comment about not putting any more $$ into your children's college fund was really mean, and soooooo beside the point.
Amen. And more.
Frankly, when you start using my children as some sort of weapon against me - I view that as a declaration of war.
I would suggest that this be your first instance of financial assertiveness in your marriage. I would move her off *your* (since she evidently is always going to view them as "not mine") children's college account. I would then look at having money taken directly from my salary and placed into that separate account *before* it is placed into the joint account.
I would be damned before I would let her use this again.
I've been concerned about this issue ever since the pudding incident, the uneven division of labor and money, and this is just a cherry on the top of it all.
You can control my money. You can conscript my labor. You can reject me from sex. You can ream me out on a weekly basis for my myriad failures and indiscretions.
But you better by gawd not use my children in your malicious power struggle.
