Now I've done it

[nephartiti]

MK, You're going to love this!

H came to get the kids and I almost laughed out loud! He bought these new rediculously thick framed trendy glasses and is combing his hair like one of those emo musicians. What on earth!!??!

I somehow managed to control myself.

I think you are right, this wonderful home is what he just can't handle. On the other hand, with the birth of our new one (who wasn't exactly planned), it did get very stressful, and we were too busy surviving to really take care of each other. So maybe our wonderful home wasn't looking as wonderful as I thought. That's what I'm working on, without saying it.

I acted "As if" and stayed up beat and pleasant (my 180). Didn't talk about R and stayed busy. When he brought the kids home, he came inside and lingered a lot longer than necessary. Think he was expecting me to try and get him to stay longer (usually have). I just went about my business and stayed pleasant. When he said he was leaving, I looked up and casually said, "OK, have a good night," then continued what I was doing. He stood at the door a minute, then said "Keep in touch" as he was leaving. This from a man who wouldn't give me his new phone number!

My dad was here too. When H came to pick up the kids, I could see he was apprehensive. His family is giving me he cold shoulder, to say it nicely, but my dad is a bigger person and greeted H respectfully. When H was leaving, after returning the kids, he actually sought out my dad to say goodbye and shake his hand.

These are baby steps, and it's still early in the process, but I think these are positive signs... right?

Now I just have to stay consistent. I will wait for him to initiate the next contact.

I did mention that I was invited to go to Vegas with a friend for a few days. He said he would be happy to take care of the kids. Said he would stay at his Aunt's with them. I told him I'd let him know. Now I have to plan a Vegas trip, which shouldn't be too hard.