That, I think, is where the "betrayal of trust" comes in. The "violation" just pours a tanker load of gas onto the already-burning fire.
I think you need to make it very clear that this “violation of trust” is only a script running in her head and no matter how she might feel about it, there was no violation at all, but just the normal thing that occurs between H & W. Don’t accept all her presuppositions. Once you do, they limit your responses and paint you into a corner. This she does intened to do.
And Cobra, I was thinking the same thing about going back to joint MC. I doubt she'd go.
I can understand that, but bring it up anyway, be adamant about it, and put her on the spot for turning you down, rather than you doing it for her.
After our most recent round of MC she said that, basically, it just brought up a bunch of stuff to further divide us, and that it was a waste of time.
That is how the process works. A couple will pull apart while the work is being done before they can later come back together. But that brings up something of a contradiction in her doesn’t it. She has basically told you that she doesn’t want to be close and will the M on hold for as long as she wants. So what is the concern whether counseling pushes you apart. In fact, why was she so put off when you told her about the sex moratorium, if she is to be believed at her word?
When her IC moved away about a year ago, W said she was done because she didn't want to go through the whole process of informing a new IC and getting comfortable talking with her.
Yeah, that does feel like a waste of money. But your counselor is up to speed with the sitch. I’m not too sure it is always good for a person to be too comfortable with their counselor anyway. Won’t hurt to request this, especially if it looks to her like a better path to whatever cage rattling you can do at home.
Also, her "client" is from her law practice...sounded like you thought she was a shrink.
No, I understood you correctly.
And, by the way, the client's hubby also filmed the act of sticking a little superhero action figure into his beloved's nether regions. I know.
Sorry, that visual was just too funny for me. Yeah, I like sick humor….
