Sandi, I posted a detailed message only to get kicked off when i submitted it, lost in cyber space, so here's a slightly abbreviated version. I pay child support, one that she asked for that was fair. My S lives with me for one week, then with his mom for one week.
I also have a 20 year old S from a previous short lived marriage (she was pregnant and I married her, ooops!) so I know what you mean by stepping back and letting them find out their mistakes on their own. I will do the same with my W.
I truly believe that although there is no etopia when it comes to marriage, I know that there is a woman out there who will think my W must have lost her marbles to let me go, that is not egotistical, it's the truth. Maybe my W will discover she didn't try hard enough to salvage our R. You have said before that men sometimes either don't listen well enough, or they don't comprehend what their W is telling them, I'm guilty as charged of that for sure. Having said that, it doesn't diminish how I feel about her, because I would do anything for her.
You mentioned you would have walked away from your H if you could have made it financially. Are you talking about when you were 1st married or in the last # of years? Because my W only worked 15 hours a week, took 1/2 the proceeds from me refinancing my house and 1/2 our assets and the child support and she is doing very well, and still only working 20 hours a week. A nice gig if you can get it! IMO....I'm sure you could have managed with the same, so it must be something a little deeper than just finances?
I will continue to return to this site and listen, read, understand, and keep working at it. Thanks, we are here for you too.
"We're here for a good time, not a long time" ________________________________________
M:48 W: 43 S;20, S;10 Married: 14 Years / Together 17 Years Bomb Dropped: 2/4/07 Separated: 6/29/07 D to be filed by my W soon.
