Lillieperl, thanks from pulling that from your archives. That was very insightful.
I do think my H wants to change and be more truthful, but maybe that he wants only to be truthful to me. He still creates lies to others. For example, he tells strangers that his son got an athletic scholarship, others he tells that he got an academic scholarship when the truth is he got neither. He got grants and student loans. Another example, he overdraws his account constantly. He has overdraft protection so they don't bounce but he owes his overdraft loan now. To me, that is lying, mostly to himself but notheless still yet a lie. I don't think these things will ever change. I see it over and over and over again. He'll try for few months when we discuss these issues, but then he slips right back. I try to stand in judgment of my H, because I believe that everyone, including myself will tell a few white lies in now and then, but when trust is such an issue in our R, even the whitest lies become painful to me. Again, I don't want to sell my H short because he truly has tried to be upfront and honest with ME, but still is dishonest in other ways. Can I live with this, sure I can, if I set my mind to it after all its minor, right? I can do all things in Christ which strengths me. It's mind over matter, I get this. I just don't know if that's the way I want to spend the rest of my life.
It's a tough question, it's a tough situation, no matter what decision or what path I take, it will be tough. Now which tough is tougher? To me, that's the question. Any answers?
