I really think this is just h trying to keep control of the situation...to know he can have me, have her, whatever. but the thing is, I do feel more detached now, and I do feel stronger, even if I caved the other day. the thing I have to really work at is to not get that invincible feeling going myself. I know this sounds really twisted, but I could see myself rationalizing using him from time to time...taking what I need physically, and pretending like I can do that and still stay detached, not care about ow, etc. I know myself well enough and I know how good I am at rationalizing stuff. and that is a slippery slope to a really bad place for me. so I'll remind myself that, and stay strong, and not go that route.
I had a good w/o at the gym and was reading a magazine while on the treadmill. the article was about a woman who now works with teen runaways, and something she tells them is they only have 2 choices...they can meet life as a victim, or as a hero. their choice. I like that. and I think it applies to those of us going thru all of this crap...we can either lay down and be that victim, or we can be the hero we deserve to be...for ourselves, for our kids/families. just wanted to share.
there was also a very cool article in my Shape this month. love it. I don't think its online, I'll look for it. it was really inspiring, about a woman who was divorced after her h left her for an ow, and how she was able to just dive in and GAL in ways that were so much fun...included getting a vespa I think. I read it last week, and I've been wanting to share it. made me smile and made me realize how good life can be if I go out and make it happen.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
