Trying to get WAW back

[mkultra]

I don't think biting is weird for a four year old. I taught preschool and I read that a percentage of children are biters and it is only weird for the larger percentage of parents who don't have biters. It is a phase they grow out of usually by kindergarten, hopefully.

If you think he is acting aggressively because of anxiety that is normal too. Your wife's reaction was not normal. It belittled you in front of the children. If she wanted to make you feel like an ineffectual parent she has issues. Everyone walks around on eggshells during this painful process. Show your wife how much you love her and the kids. Agree with her and that will make her less defensive. Say, "You're right about my frustration in dealing with these tantrums but of course I would never hit a child. Not even on accident. Let's try 1,2,3 Magic."

My D6 headbutted me out of frustration and she jerked her head into my closed hand. Then she yelled that she was punched on her head. Boy, was I mad. I had to actually tell her that she is not allowed to make up lies about anyone hitting her. Can you imagine? If my H and I were together, no issue. He would always back me up. Saying, "Mind your mother!" Now that he is on the other side of custody, everything is on eggshells. My D knows that she is afraid to have to move in with her Dad. Which will probably never happen. She sleeps in my bed clutching me begging for a dog, saying she never wants to move from our home. It is such an upheaval.