Jak, The author of the book I'm reading, "It's Mostly His Fault," states that the woman sets the standards in a M. It's up to her to let the H know what he needs to work on as a H, and to not accept less. I get the sense he thinks men need remedial work when it comes to connection and intimacy. I think he makes an interesting point.
This advice reminds me of the chapter in "Divorce Remedy" where the partners ask for what they want. The difference in this book is that he believes the men have to work at connection and intimacy first, before they can start complaining about their W.
He believes that for a M to have a chance, the W must take a leadership role and state what the H needs to work on. Husband's in a troubled M, need a 2X4, with clear directions.
CL
CL 53 W 54 M 20 yrs. 03'-09' Separation + Old Patterns + GAL 10-14' Piecing
"The Master allows things to happen. She shapes events as they come."
