R talks are very often a bad idea when you're DBing, but I don't think they're simply "anti-DB". There are definitely times when they should be avoided though. One of the best tests is to ask yourself the question... is this going to get me closer to my goal?
Looking at my last interaction with my H for example, I didn't need to start sharing with him where my head had been at recently in regards to us. I'd say that could qualify as R talk that wasn't necessary, in hindsight. BUT... can't say I regret it.... because I know I wasn't trying to force R talk... was just going with the flow of our convo and being myself. It felt like something that could help me get closer to my goal.
Not sure I follow ya on feeling entitled because you are trying to detach. ?? Maybe if you said you were trying to distance yourself from your H. Forcing R talk will do just that.
Me: 37 M: 14 yrs Separated 10/06; Filed for D 12/07 Life is good.
