Thanks again frank but let us just conclude this conversation. I am in a good place right now and I want to keep it that way. I am on a comfortable path - I am sorry that you do not agree with it or support it.
Your words. I never said I disagree or don't support your path. I only did my best to point out that there are always opportunities in any interactions with an 'ex wife' to make it better. And, making it 'better' means that you won't have to live for the next 10 years being bitter and angry every time you deal with her. neither will she.
Jeff, that's really all I care about. That the path you are on can find some healing for you and for her. That's it. For your sake, the kids sake and because I care. Maybe the way I presented my observations caused you to feel defensive and if so, then I didn't do a very good job.
I hope you continue to feel good about your choices and find what you are looking for, maybe a woman who doesn't need you to be her 'daddy'. I don't know. Either way you certainly deserve your happiness like everyone else.
Quote:
It seems everyone is angry or bitter or judgemental if they disagree with you I see.
Really?
Whether someone disagrees with me doesn't determine if I think they are stuck in anger, bitterness or judgement. Many people disagree with me and many people change my perception of things. I see what I see and I say what I feel.I admit when I'm wrong and I learn from others.
When I get a sense that someone is reacting to an issue very strongly, more so than others may be, then it's a sure bet it's resonating with something they feel emotional about in their OWN life.
Quote:
You should be proud of your accomplishments - less than 5% of the marriages that land here are saved. But trying to say that there is only one answer or one path b/c it worked for YOU, with YOUR W, in your UNIQUE situation....
It's true that a very few of the marriages that land here are 'saved'. By the time they do get here they have progressed way beyond any rational discussion and into the absurd, insane place of affairs, anger, bitterness or other crazy making situations.
I'm surprised that any DO get saved but it seems like the ones that DO are because they got here BEFORE it was really out of control, and they calmed themselves down and kept the anger and bitterness at bay.
I never advocate that MY way is the ONLY way or the BEST way. You probably don't read my posts to others threads except FIB's. On some I tell them to 'tough love' the person and boot them out. Others I say that they need to run like hell because this person is a psychopath.
With you, my message is 'work through the anger and look for the positives because you'll be interacting with this person for a long time.'
Quote:
I know deep down that you are really trying to help but this is not helping.
Thanks again for stopping by. I wish you all the best.
And the best to you too. The conversation is 'concluded'.
