Plank removed from eye, too late for WAW? 4

[Heimlich]

Why did you pursue her

No clue. Combo of stupidity and remnants of closeness from spending time together. Wierd situation. Got confused.

but that you will be there no matter what?

Not quite sure I communicated this to her. For now, yes, she knows I'm still interested. I think she knows at some point that's going to pass -- 2 months, 4 months, 1 year -- who knows, but I'll move on. Oddly enough, I actually don't feel this way (doormat) because for us to have a good R, she would have to accept me more than she has in the past. And, I've told her that I'm glad I'm moving out because I need the space as well -- something that I really believe. Honestly, wish I had done this a while back. Implied in that is that I'm not 'a doormat.' You're right in that she might perceive that, though I don't think she does. She's been prefacing anything related to me or the apartment with something to the effect of "I don't want to impinge on your space."

There's a strange dynamic going on that I'm just not smart enough to figure out. As I move closer to moving out, she becomes friendlier. Perhaps this is the removal of pressure from both of us. Perhaps it's more of the "old" me coming through again. Perhaps it's relief that I'm getting the hell out of her life.

Not mentioned in my previous post is that I've been getting a lot of the smiles and glances during conversation that I've not gotten recently (past two months). That continued after the conversation by the van -- also some joking from her after that conversation as well (actually kindof funny, she saw a driving school car from Potomac, just south of us, very wealthy neighborhood -- owner of the Redskins, lots of Internet money, etc. -- said she saw a drviers school car. The car they were driving -- a corvette.). It's like too much pursuit is bad. Absolutely. However, a little seems to be OK. Trying to straddle that line of "I'm OK with moving on" but "The door is still open" is killing me. Keep in mind that my W and I are both not into playing emotional games.

She's laughing at more of my jokes than in the past, and it seems there's a correlation to being close/spending time together and me being more emotionally open. Until about a week ago, she seemed very closed off/pissed at any hint of "hey, I still like you." Now, seems like it's Ok with her (I've said twice, in response to her saying "that's how I am." that "I know, and I still like you anyway." Got a laugh both times.)

gobble up the space you gave her

I nibbled.

uncomfortable enough to approach you a bit

Kiss on the cheek/hug after all of this. Plus, she came downstairs to see if I wanted to watch an episode of Monk (around 10). I had mentioned it in the afternoon, but only once.

I'll keep you apprised of the touching situation.

C'mon OT, what do I have to do to get a full fledged HARRRUMPPPHH! Of course, I like to think I'm smart enough not to do anything like that.

I really am confused. A little reassurance seems to sit well with W. ARRRRGGGGGG.

BD