When's it my turn?

[SDFoundGirl]

Thanks a ton, guys!

One of the areas of my life I continually struggle with is my self-esteem. I'm all too ready to believe what others think...or create great stories in my head about what others think.

I don't hate myself, not at all. But I know I have a difficult time seeing myself the way I actually am. In my best moments, I'll tell you I'm a phenomenal teacher. I don't teach content, I teach STUDENTS. I teach the whole child, and I give them what they need at that moment. Sometimes that means I have to stop my lesson to help them work through an issue they had with another teacher they find unfair. Sometimes that means my primary goal for a kid is not academic but social or emotional, like the girl who thought she was worthless/ugly/too tall/stupid last year who wore her Shoe-worthy high heels to 8th grade graduation last year.

I love who I am, I love the type of teacher I am. But...it's hard when the criticism flies, even if it's unfounded. I had a bitter, angry grandma taking shots at my intelligence last night, and I wanted to ask her who the f*ck crawled up her @ss and opened an umbrella.

And I'm doing WAY better this morning because I honestly realize it's not about me. She's unhappy, and the freaked-out parents are just wanting what's best for their child. They're operating on a completely different model of what success is than I am, and that's okay. They'll either come to appreciate me, just deal with me, or move their child out of the school, and it has nothing to do with my qualifications as a teacher.

I won't change who I am to something that isn't real. I'll be the first person to say I still have a lot left to learn, but then, who of us doesn't? It's part of what I love about teaching.

So I'm doing lots better. Thank you all for your words of encouragement; they mean a lot.

Hoping you guys have a fantastic holiday weekend. As for me, that's what *I* choose.

Love you all,

SD