he just left. I didn't expect him till after dinner, it was never set firmly or anything, but this job is more of an office one so didn't expect him early. he came in, ate some chicken I had cooked for the kids dinner (???) in case I needed to give it to them, and w/o saying much at all (did ask about my plans, I was non-committal), he gathered them up and left. I went outside to clean up the outside toys (we were outside most of the day) while he was putting the carseats in his car and he was on the phone, quickly scrambled off, telling her he'd call right back, when he saw me. my stomach is sick just from that. he did try to take one of our beach chairs (nice, the ones my parents gave us, just lovely, ass) but he couldn't get it to fit right.
I didn't ask, I couldn't. my position has been clear, if he violates it, we'll deal with it then. and you all are right...I'm not going to make a scene, and short of locking him in the basement...which would be a sight, since at 180 he's what, 60lbs heavier than me...there wasn't anything I could do but remind him of my stance. thankfully he didn't put me in that position.
that sounds insane, doesn't it? thankfully he hasn't put me in that position? look what position he has put me in.
I'm gonna be that solomon parent if it kills me. I am. and it just might. okay, it won't kill me, it will make me stronger.
now I'm going to have a good cry, then clean up and go have a good sweat at the gym. I'm feeling rather troll-like at the moment.
and grrr to him eating my freaking chicken. I suppose I should be grateful he didn't find the cookies from yesterday.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
