W is out at a party with friends tonight - in classic DB style I wished her well and said 'Enjoy the night'. Know she is not with OP, so hope it goes well.
Here's a synopsis of last couple of weeks:
1. Counsellor seems to be leaning to my point of view (IMHO) and advocating working on the marriage. W still very angry, but seems that part of this is shame (could be very wrong).
2. Approached W about secret email account. Very quiet spoken and stated I was dissappointed. Initial reaction was of anger, but this changed into lots of tears from W. Told her I would not pry (haven't for months and proud of it). Long R talk before trip to Scotland to see her family.
3. Together as family in caravan. Asked to be intimate, got rejected. Next night (and in her switched off week), explained what I was going to do to her and (seduced?) her. Not great and did get it thrown back at me, but in one sense she is allowing me to touch her.
4. W stressed at family, starts having a go at me. Throws previous nights sex as 'I didn't say yes'. Could have argued the point (she certainly enjoyed it), but thought better of it and more anger and tears (now directed at family). On hand to cuddle and hold her, so positive there.
5. W having period, so no intimacy, but still cuddled up. Several trips with family and me acting happy and upbeat. Not a bad holiday, but W was stressed by this and work txting.
6. Back home and W stressed immediately by work. Tea and toast at 2.00 a.m. as she can't sleep. Meets with boss and is changing job (real close to home and much less stress). Talking now about holiday in October (Ireally thought she wouldn't go) and planning cover for her work.
7. Last night. I was out with nephew and arrived home late. Helped put kids to bed and checked computer. W had been on and checked her site (can tell but don't peak). Politely pointed out that I am aware when she checks but I won't invade privacy. Little bit of hostility (I have the back of a duck now) and comments thrown about, but nothing major. Talk about her work and supporting her all the way.
8. Early morning. Wake up to find W awake - can't sleep - Life, Universe and Everything. Suggest sex as a steam valve, not expecting a postive response, but get a non-committal one in return (its not an emphatic no), fun and intimacy ensue, followed by tears from W.
So, in one breath OP is still on scene, but no physical contact for months and the other is that we have had some intimacy when I thought we wouldn't.
So living each day as it comes, with a Status Quo concert tomorrow together. Will update again after the weekend.
