trying to get a grip...

[HBT]

Any advice would be welcome. I have a sitch going on in MLC but I am having a very hard time dealing with the separation. My h has been checking in or calling almost daily since he moved out; even stayed a few nights previously. But...

Every time he comes over for his short visits, I can feel him deliberately distancing himself, says he doesn't want to take advantage of me or give me false hopes. He is expressing verbally his state of confusion and trying to decide whether to work on our M or not. Up to now he had been 'trying' to keep an open mind about physical affection as we were practically inseperable before he snapped. He says there is too much resentment and lost feelings that I've created to bring him to this place. He's even told me I'm just fooling myself that our connection is/was there! We had always been the couple who made everyone sick to be around; very close. He's been living with ss until he can decide and it is 'all he can think about'.

My Q is this: if he IS in this state of confusion, whether to work on us or flee the M, isn't there anything else that can be done except to detach myself? Should I dare show him the DB book? Try again to get him to C?

I'm afraid if I LET him give up on us and he goes further away from the M, he is trying to convince himself it is over and it will be. He acts as if the decision is going to be made and thats what hes going to do. He just started consulting with his closest friends. I feel him slipping away...