Well it's been awhile so I thought I'd give a little update, another baby step.
W and I and the kids went camping for a few days, with W's bro, his GF, his kids and her kids. We had a good time, and here was a baby step. BIL's GF kept nagging him about how the car was packed. She did most of it, and did not like the few things that he did. So she nagged, nagged, nagged about it.
They left a day before we did, so our family had a day/night just to ourselves. So W and I took a walk one morning and had a nice talk. She apologized for all the times she nagged me about packing the car. We both agreed that it's an individual style, not a strict formula. So anyway SHE packed the car for the trip home, and I just helped her. Not much input but just assisted. The few bits of input I gave fell largely on deaf ears so I just helped her with it HER way.
Low and behold, the winds got gusty on the way home, and the big box with all of our gear rolled off the top of the car. Luckily she was slowing down and the stuff did'nt get damaged but we had to repack on the side of the highway. So this was clearly my opportunity to be the Alpha Male, and that load did'nt budge the rest of the way home.
Nothing new on the sexual scene but she's getting more and more confident, and comfortable about our future together. She definately wants to stay together, forever, but she's still struggling with the sex. It's weird but I look at it as scar tissue from a healed wound. Fallout from the bomb. I'm still hopefull, still determined, still wild enough to stick my neck out.
I'm gonna keep on taking every opportunity to show the Alpha Male, moving on with MY life, romancing, dancing, keeping things lively, and taking things one moment at a time. Life is VERY good right now!!
Love to all!
COG
My Story http://www.divorcebusting.com/forum...&Number=660444&page=2#Post660444
COG, I loved your story (on another divorce busted). I just can't imagine 5 1/2 years! I hope you & W continue to grow together and that you resolve the S issue. Are you still reading around here on the SSM? A lot of good things seem to be happening lately w/ a lot of the folks around here.
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
~ Fabulous. You are truly blessed. Take care COG. You are still in my thoughts and prayers.. thanks for the update. I was so glad to read it. God bless....
Okay it's been awhile so it's time for an update. Overall things are going very well. Spent some good family time, trips, this summer, and kid's are back to school. Some mixed emotions there because now W is back to her 14 hour days. She goes friggin 95 miles and hour, and does'nt stop. Crazy woman.
We're still in SSM land. I would'nt consider myself starving, but I can't seem to get my fill. It's baby steps, weird. Like the sun rises and sets. It's hard to see the movement if you watch continuously, but if you check every few hours it's easier to see. We've made huge progress from even a year ago. W is getting more and more comfortable with the physical stuff, but she's still not sexual.
I'm practicing the alpha male stuff. Flirting, backing off, then flirting some more. I'm feeling a little of the old COG mojo coming back. The fun, outgoing, fearless warrior that I am. I'm still a little reserved around her though, a little worried that the real me isn't good enough, what BS. Working through that though. I'm well aware she'd never find a better man than me. No better lover exists on this earth, no better friend, no better mate. I'm the best!
She knows the sex starvation is not okay with me. I'm not lettin up on her, not going to bury my head in the pillow. She can't hold out forever. Also, I've realized that I can survive without sex. I don't NEED sex, well don't really need it with a person. Fulfillment comes from within (and a nice soapy shower helps).
We both remain committed to the M. In fact more committed than ever. My W takes very good care of me and the kids. She's awesome really. Fun, connected, and beautiful. We're making future plans together, gradually meshing the finances back together. It's really hard to explain but she continues to soften, albeit very very gradual. It's the progress that continues to keep me hopeful.
I'm still the initiator of almost all the physical contact and it's getting more and more comfortable. She's got a great butt, almost perfect, and last night I could'nt keep my hands off it. And she did'nt keep my hands off it either.
God Bless,
COG
PS Still looking forward to moving out of the SSM forum, and into the next chapter.
My Story http://www.divorcebusting.com/forum...&Number=660444&page=2#Post660444
Glad to hear things are going great for you COG - I was wondering what you were doing
Keep "up" the good work !!
Heywyre
M - 57 H - 65 1st A-bomb - Nov 27/02 2nd A-bomb - Dec 13/06 together 21 years *************************** Insanity is doing something over and over and expecting different results (Albert Einstein)
In my months of lurking yours is the story (well, and grashoppers) that inspired me to further efforts, and kept me from complete despair. Thanks for the update.
LM
Lucky me, I could have been someone else FOREVER! Whew, that was close!
I wondered how you were doing COG. You must have great restraint. I'm personally fairly HD (I guess) so I'm more in favor of 3-4 times per week so I can definitely sympathize with your plight. Here's to hoping your wife suddenly finds herself with an overwhelming sex drive and you can't even keep up (but are willing to try).
Me
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
COG... I need your kind words.