From my perspective and having done some of those things.(Man I hope I'm married to one of you, then I could finally say we are working on things!)
It's about insecurity, in my experiance I felt like W was not committed to the R and would leave, so I attempted to tie her down without any thought of her feelings. So I'm out on weekend trips and she is home in the house stuck, and I'm the one worried about her leaving???? Well of course eventually she stood up and walked out, I treated her as if she would leave and she did.
If you can make him feel more secure about the R, even verbally explaining that this behavior bothers me and it's what makes me want to leave. Just a thought.
